Victoria Coren Mitchell - Writer, Broadcaster & Poker Player

We’ve all done it…

Monday, 1 September 2008

I’ve been enjoying Paul Carr’s book Bringing Nothing To The Party, about the world of new media. But I had to raise an eyebrow (which I can actually do; the left one) when he mentions a job he used to have writing for a sex magazine,

“where I reviewed adult DVDs on the basis of plot alone, making me the first person in the history of the universe to fast-forward through the sex scenes in porn films to get to the dialogue.”

  In the history of the universe? Cheeky scamp! Do these words ring no bells for Mr. Carr…

  “Sex for sex’s sake stopped holding our interest. We became entranced by the bits that other consumers fast-forward: the introduction of a character, the development of a spurious narrative, the rationale for removing a pair of trousers. And we often whizzed through the bits that other consumers freeze-frame. A kiss is just a kiss, a blow-job’s just a blow-job – but watching a dumb eighteen-year-old beefcake from Minnesota trying to flesh out the role of an elderly English aristocrat (before getting a blow-job) is absolutely mesmerising.”

  Even though he was working closely with one of the authors (my friend Charlie) within a year of its publication, Paul Carr has clearly forgotten this unmissable adventure…


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Jim at 9:27 am on September 1st, 2008

Ordered my copy last week, you can stop dropping hints ;-)

Victoria Coren at 10:08 am on September 1st, 2008

Good work, Jim! Another million sales and we may yet make back the cost of that bloody film…  :-)

David Young at 12:26 pm on September 2nd, 2008

This talk of porn reviews reminds me of a great online diary I read years ago. It was written by a woman who worked in a video store with a large porn department. She writes about the customers who rent the porn. It’s facinating stuff.

Of course with internet downloads, fewer and fewer people will be going to video stores to rent this material, so it’s a vital record of a disappearing age. Worth reading for some great insights into human nature.


Paul Carr at 9:23 am on September 24th, 2008

Ha! You’re absolutely right, Vicky - I apologise. To make matters worse, your reviews were also far, far funnier than mine. Glad you’re enjoying the book - hope all’s well with you.


HairyMan at 5:19 am on November 12th, 2008

Not bad… Not bad.

Victoria Coren

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